Every time we say our feelings are because of situations or people, we are blaming them for our state of mind. Discipline people and get work done but without fluctuating your state of mind, which means work needs to be done but our happiness is not dependent on it.
Each one of us is responsible for our feelings. People are not responsible for how we feel and we are not responsible for how others feel. We can take care of our thoughts and actions, but finally others will create their own feelings and we should not feel guilty if others are creating pain.
Nothing and no one is in our control, other people’s mind may not do what we want, we only have control on our own mind. Irrespective of things happening outside, we consciously choose our feelings inside.
We are shifting from blaming to personal responsibility. Become aware of typical situations or personality traits in people like dishonesty, laziness, being late etc which cause irritation, anger or hurt. Now consciously choose to remain stable in response to people’s behaviours.
Even if something has happened in the past, we cannot blame the past for our feelings today. Our feelings today are entirely our choice and our responsibility.
Everything outside is a stimulus – past experiences, present situations, planetary movements. Irrespective of the stimulus, the response is our creation. I the soul am already peace, love, contentment. Nothing outside needs to be perfect for us to experience our own qualities, we already have them.
People don’t insult us, they give their opinion. We take their words and make them our identity and then use that identity to create hurt. Mood created in one situation, if not corrected, gets recorded in our subconscious. Any trigger will bring the pattern from the subconscious to the conscious and very soon this becomes our prevailing mood. Do not make the emotion your identity, like I am sad, I am aggressive. It is a creation, it will pass. If we identify with it, we expect it to come and accept it when it comes. Face the emotion. Do not try to escape it by distracting your mind with movies, alcohol, working, holidaying or talking to people.
Time cannot heal us. We choose how much time we take to heal ourselves. Face the emotion and find the tool of knowledge to heal it, do not leave it to time. Desires are scenes which we create on the screen of our mind. When the scene in reality is different from the one on the mind, the mind perceives it as a loss, and we create pain. Unfulfilled desires create pain. Let’s reduce our desires ,and give everything the liberty to happen the first time in reality, as it is meant to be.
When talking to family and friends about our emotions, focus should be on healing the emotion not discussing the problem and the emotion. Anything done repeatedly becomes a habit. It is our creation and we can change by creating a new habit. Focus on creating the new habit rather than finishing the old one. Morning meditation silences the conscious mind and implants the seeds of new habits in the subconscious mind.
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